Friday, 26 September 2008

Foggy morning, foggy brain!

It feels very autumnal this morning. We also have fog here in Rugby. The weather perfectly mirrors the way I feel. Fogged up and lacking in focus.

I've overdone it on the exercise this week and I'm so stiff; so tired. You know when it hurts to sit down; hurts to stand up? I just want to lie down and read, which is just how I'm going to spend the morning, I think.

It all started with a Spin class on Monday morning. Not feeling great after overindulging on the wine the day before (well, it was my birthday!) really didn't help. After the class I just flopped on the sofa and moaned about feeling exhausted the rest of the day. Tuesday and my calf muscles were screaming. I could barely walk down the stairs. However, it didn't stop me going mad with the housework (what got into me?) and doing an hour on the Wii Fit (including lots of 'step'). Wednesday and my calf muscles were screaming even louder. However, I bravely set off for my Legs, Bums and Tums class, after running a mile or so on the treadmill. And there we had to do more step aerobics and lunges off the step during which I thought my calf muscles were going to snap. Pain, pain! Thursday and my calves were okay, but my hamstrings and glutes were aching like mad. But it didn't stop me going to the Cardio Tone class where I was subjected to an hour of Jane Fonda-type aerobics called Body Attack. Lots of dancey-type moves which I hate. Felt very poncy. I had very little energy and kept looking outside at the sunshine, wishing I'd gone for a long walk with my friends instead. I spent the rest of yesterday wincing every time I sat down and feeling about 92.

It's been a rubbish week for writing. I've hardly opened up my novel file. I feel very guilty about it and annoyed with myself that I seem to have shifted my priorities almost without realising it. Exercise and diet have become my primary focus again. Why? Because I felt very fat. Because I overindulged on wine and chocolate at the weekend. Silly, silly, silly. When will I ever learn? However, I'm feeling slimmer now, thank goodness, and can perhaps do a little less exercise and more writing next week.

I've just rediscovered Marge Piercy after a very kind writer friend bought me her novel, Three Women, for my birthday. I intend to tuck into it any minute now! Gone to Soldiers is one of my all-time favourite books. I recommend it.


Penny A said...

Hello again!
Fog here too until far too late to get much going this morning.. but now sunny - and there's NO EXCUSE :-)

lifemodel said...

I think you may possibly be using exercise to a) beat yourself up and b) avoid writing.... this is not good! Aim for a healthy balance. (Yes, mum)

Anonymous said...

I do appreciate the battle to keep moving when the heart wants to do what it loves which all involves sitting. Im an avid book reader/collector and love writing but havent been able to tame my imagination to stick to one line of story. I wish my motivation while exercising was as energetic as the flea in my brain that keeps putting me off writing beyond two or three pages. My characters & their backstory keep changing (within minutes/nano seconds) so they are all over the place, first she is an accountant, then a gardener, then selfemployed, then a government worker - its tying my imagination down to stick to one solid character. She has a brother, then he changes into a cousin, then into a close gay friend, again I cant glue this woman character's life together to stay put. So I stop the battle and turn to reading a novel that at least some author has managed to pin down. Love the fog - I live in New Zealand and going to Rugby in winter of 2003 was like a pilgrimage - I brought back a miniture rugby ball having chatted to someone in the museum for a time about the All Blacks & history. Loved your Kintyre pics as well, very dreamy and peaceful. Ultimately, even if you are not working out at the gym, make sure each day has been the "best", I too have to miss gym visits while I meet family needs, but I know I will go when I feel ready.