Yesterday I took delivery of Issue 2 of The Yellow Room Magazine. It will be posted out to subscribers before the end of the week. If you don't subscribe and fancy taking a look, then please send a cheque for £5.50 made payable to J M Derrick, 1 Blake Close, Bilton, Rugby CV22 7LJ or you can visit the website (www.theyellowroom-magazine.co.uk) and pay online. I have just one copy of Issue 1 left.
We had a lovely relaxing time in Suffolk and were so lucky with the weather. It was warm, sunny and dry all week. It was so good to have time away to take a long, hard look at 'my life', which sounds very deep and meaningful. I think I'm going through a mid-life crisis. I feel as if I'm at a crossroads and don't know which road to take. I'm having serious doubts about my ability as a writer and wonder if writing is what I really want to do. I love editing the magazine, so that is something I will continue to do. However, I'm not sure I have the talent, motivation or the staying power to be a real writer. I find it all so demoralising. There are so many brilliant writers out there and getting published is so damn hard! Do I want it enough to persevere? I'm not sure that I do.
It worries me that I have no driving ambition to do or be anything in particular. I think I'm rapidly turning into my mother who was happy to stay at home, do housework (okay, maybe not exactly like her) and read/do puzzles. What's wrong with me? Aaargh......
Autumn the 1st
2 days ago